Ain’t it just grand?
AIN ISSA, SYRIA—As they streamed out of detention camps in northern Syria following U.S. withdrawal of military support in the region, jubilant ISIS prisoners on Monday hailed their American liberators. “We never thought we’d see the day when someone would finally stand up for us and free us from the Syrian Democratic Forces’ clutches,” said ISIS member Mohsin Al-Lateef as hundreds of his recently liberated fellow jihadist militants praised President Donald Trump and raised American flags in tribute to their emancipators. “For years, we opposed the United States for their intervention in our lands, but now we see that they strongly believe in our mission to establish a caliphate across our ancient lands and put infidels to death. We will honor the U.S. for not only standing down in support of our fight against the Syrian Kurds but for stoking chaos in the region to give us a chance to regroup and re-emerge stronger than ever before. God bless America!” At press time, President Trump had shared a video of the liberated ISIS prisoners celebrating and thanked them for their support.